I wish I had seen this movie about eight years ago, long before I started to don the mask of irony and I lost the ability to indulge in mindless cool. I am rather sure that the director goes home, sits in the back of an American muscle car and masturbates to Robert Rodriguez films, then wipes his semen off on Preacher graphic novels, or anything else written by Garth Ennis. It is not that the movie is bad in the classical sense; it’s just that for a movie that seems to take itself rather seriously, it came off as particularly juvenile at times. when i say, at times, i mean all the time. It felt like the kind of story a kid would write in high school, and after he hands it in, he and his parents get called into the principal’s office so that little Tommy boy can explain himself. A part of me wants to go, “holy shit, their fucking in the middle of a gun fight, sweet”. To a lesser extent I am having Ghost Rider flash backs, though not as severe. Maybe this movie is Nicholas Cage trying to make amends. If that is the case, six points for effort but some of his lines were so unbelievable they made me flinch more than any of the gore. But the contractual “hot chick” in this movie is particularly fan-hard-on-inducing-tastic. It might sound strange, but the demon who gets sent down to catch him, to me at least, was so cool that I would say it saved this movie from being nothing more than a bad CGI, cars to compensate for not having a penis, too many explosions, ultra violent, needless tits and demonic elements movie.
Oh and well done mister writer sir, I get it, a guy who breaks out of hell called Milton, who happens to get shot in the eye. Very clever.
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